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Non-Sequitur Showdown
Old 06-09-2011, 04:53 PM   #1
Affinity
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Non-Sequitur Showdown

non-sequitur: a statement (as a response) that does not follow logically from or is not clearly related to anything previously said

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Were I to find the entire squadron, Jim, I will engage. I insist upon this. For they have told me so.





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Old 06-09-2011, 04:54 PM   #2
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My hovercraft is full of eels.
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Old 06-09-2011, 05:36 PM   #3
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I studied Fairy Wicca for a week or two this one time about 15 years ago.
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And when Kick says "fuck no" you know it's FUCK NO!
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Old 06-09-2011, 05:39 PM   #4
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following the Luftwaffe into battle, i found i had forgotten my sandwich in my other pants.
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I believe your battle-stance attitude to posting on a free forum is part of your forum issues... After awhile you have to figure that it's not all of the forum owners and poster's that make up the problems you devise for yourself... Floating from forum to forum complaining, insulting the owner, demanding and proclaiming them failures is a very telling pattern of behavior.
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:40 PM   #5
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everyday we're standing in a time capsule racing down the river from the past
everyday we're standing in a wind tunnel facing down the future coming fast
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:46 PM   #6
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i lost the keys to my toaster
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I've already experienced the joy of real sex and LSD. And watching cartoons and smoking great weed.
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It's all faux noise until you open your door and some person yells "SCII BITCH" and begins hitting you in the head with a baseball bat.
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Right now, in Arizona, I can't marry my sister
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Old 06-09-2011, 06:51 PM   #7
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For lack of a Firewire cable, I can't hook up my sound module.

P2
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:13 PM   #8
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I like pie
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:17 PM   #9
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"I had to give up chewin' tobaccy after the last space helmet upgrade."
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:20 PM   #10
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Porcupine stew, it's all the rage!
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:22 PM   #11
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my softballs bring all the girls to the yard
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:23 PM   #12
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this thread reads like a sarah palin interview
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:50 PM   #13
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So you think you can dance?
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Old 06-09-2011, 07:55 PM   #14
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He warned the British that they weren't going be taking away our arms, by ringing those bells, and making sure as he's riding his horse through town to send those warning shots and bells that we were going to be secure and we were going to be free, and we were going to be armed.
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Old 06-09-2011, 08:15 PM   #15
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Had he brought what he was told to bring, the party would have been a disaster. Since he did not, it was not. However, some of the lawsuits that resulted might have taken on a less personal nature.
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Old 06-09-2011, 10:34 PM   #16
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Hot buttered English muffins, Canadian-style bacon, and poached eggs are topped by a heavenly drizzle of hollandaise sauce. Wonderful for Easter, Mother's Day, or anytime you want to treat yourself to the best brunch in the world! Serve with roasted potatoes for mopping up the extra egg yolk and hollandaise. If you prefer, you can substitute ham for the Canadian bacon in this recipe.
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Old 06-09-2011, 10:36 PM   #17
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Is that true Trout? Because I don't believe Johnny.
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Old 06-09-2011, 11:08 PM   #18
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There isn't any symbolism. The sea is the sea. The old man is an old man. The boy is a boy and the fish is a fish. The shark are all sharks no better and no worse. All the symbolism that people say is shit. What goes beyond is what you see beyond when you know.
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Old 06-10-2011, 01:04 AM   #19
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There were things said that should have not been said. There were things that were not said that should have been said. When all was said and not said, Godot had still not arrived.
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Old 06-10-2011, 01:10 AM   #20
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Vienna sausages sound like they'd be fancy, but they are not.
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It's just words! It's not magic unicorn poop smeared on the tarot cards by a gypsy soothsayer in a voodoo trance.

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One of the hardest things to believe is the abysmal depth of human stupidity. - Robert A. Heinlein
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2 users agreed. You should agree too, c'mon, you know you want to. (click it, click it now!)

Old 06-10-2011, 01:11 AM   #21
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Remove bacon rind and cut into lardons (sticks 1/4-inch thick and 1 1/2 inches long). Simmer rind and lardons for 10 minutes in 1 1/2 quarts water. Drain and dry.

Preheat oven to 450 degrees.

Sauté lardons in 1 tablespoon of the olive oil in a flameproof casserole over moderate heat for 2 to 3 minutes to brown lightly. Remove to a side dish with a slotted spoon.

Dry beef in paper towels; it will not brown if it is damp. Heat fat in casserole until almost smoking. Add beef, a few pieces at a time, and sauté until nicely browned on all sides. Add it to the lardons.

In the same fat, brown the sliced vegetables. Pour out the excess fat.

Return the beef and bacon to the casserole and toss with 1/2 teaspoon salt and 1/4 teaspoon pepper.

Then sprinkle on the flour and toss again to coat the beef lightly. Set casserole uncovered in middle position of preheated oven for 4 minutes.

Toss the meat again and return to oven for 4 minutes (this browns the flour and coves the meat with a light crust).

Remove casserole and turn oven down to 325 degrees.

Stir in wine and 2 to 3 cups stock, just enough so that the meat is barely covered.

Add the tomato paste, garlic, herbs and bacon rind. Bring to a simmer on top of the stove.

Cover casserole and set in lower third of oven. Regulate heat so that liquid simmers very slowly for 3 to 4 hours. The meat is done when a fork pierces it easily.

While the beef is cooking, prepare the onions and mushrooms.

Heat 1 1/2 tablespoons butter with one and one-half tablespoons of the oil until bubbling in a skillet.

Add onions and sauté over moderate heat for about 10 minutes, rolling them so they will brown as evenly as possible. Be careful not to break their skins. You cannot expect them to brown uniformly.

Add 1/2 cup of the stock, salt and pepper to taste and the herb bouquet.

Cover and simmer slowly for 40 to 50 minutes until the onions are perfectly tender but hold their shape, and the liquid has evaporated. Remove herb bouquet and set onions aside.

Wipe out skillet and heat remaining oil and butter over high heat. As soon as you see butter has begun to subside, indicating it is hot enough, add mushrooms.

Toss and shake pan for 4 to 5 minutes. As soon as they have begun to brown lightly, remove from heat.

When the meat is tender, pour the contents of the casserole into a sieve set over a saucepan.

Wash out the casserole and return the beef and lardons to it. Distribute the cooked onions and mushrooms on top.

Skim fat off sauce in saucepan. Simmer sauce for a minute or 2, skimming off additional fat as it rises. You should have about 2 1/2 cups of sauce thick enough to coat a spoon lightly.

If too thin, boil it down rapidly. If too thick, mix in a few tablespoons stock. Taste carefully for seasoning.

Pour sauce over meat and vegetables. Cover and simmer 2 to 3 minutes, basting the meat and vegetables with the sauce several times.

Serve in casserole, or arrange stew on a platter surrounded with potatoes, noodles or rice, and decorated with parsley.
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Old 06-10-2011, 01:19 AM   #22
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Words of profound wisdom, part 5,682:
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Work the system, or the system works you.
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Old 06-10-2011, 01:23 AM   #23
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Old 06-10-2011, 01:26 AM   #24
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Martin Luther King had a dream. Dreams are where Elmo and Toy Story had a party and I was invited. Yay! My turn is over!
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Old 06-10-2011, 01:28 AM   #25
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Why do people in ship mutinies always ask for "better treatment"? I'd ask for a pinball machine, because with all that rocking back and forth you'd probably be able to get a lot of free games.
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Old 06-10-2011, 01:30 AM   #26
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Advanced political lessons and morality sayings, part 10,847:

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Ah...so now congress is not responsible for their votes because Bush told them a lie...

It just gets better and better ... It's impossible to make up shit this funny.
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Old 06-10-2011, 01:45 AM   #27
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And where is * l'arlesienne* again?
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Old 06-10-2011, 02:04 AM   #28
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Last night I dreamt I went to Mandalay again.
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Old 06-10-2011, 02:07 AM   #29
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Indeed, the rate of increase is increasing at an increasingly decreasing rate.
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Old 06-10-2011, 03:24 AM   #30
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To The Devil, A Daughter.
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Old 06-10-2011, 10:40 AM   #31
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I would like

to feed your fingers

to the wolverines.
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Old 06-10-2011, 11:03 AM   #32
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Slithy toves my ass.
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Old 06-10-2011, 02:49 PM   #33
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Snicker snack was not meant to be a joke about food, you know.
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Old 06-10-2011, 03:25 PM   #34
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(^_^)
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Old 06-10-2011, 06:00 PM   #35
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Has James Bond gone rogue?
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Old 06-10-2011, 06:07 PM   #36
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You've got to be kidding! That would be like slapping rouge on a meerkat.
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Old 06-10-2011, 08:43 PM   #37
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.
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Ask the libs. That's what they created welfare for!
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Old 06-10-2011, 08:46 PM   #38
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Time is an illusion, lunchtime, doubly so.
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Old 06-10-2011, 08:48 PM   #39
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If I had enough time, I could read you the which and the why of it, but for now, you'll have to settle for the simple story, which you know already.
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Old 06-10-2011, 08:51 PM   #40
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And then one day, he was shooting at some food, and up from the ground came a'bubblin' crude.
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