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-   -   The Comings and Goings of Mero (http://www.secondcitizen.net/Forum/showthread.php?t=15551)

Dakota Tebaldi 06-01-2012 12:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merovigan (Post 434795)
And I am no one to suggest such a lifestyle change to her.

Are you feeling ill suddenly?

Merovigan 06-01-2012 12:42 PM

I would be fine with that setup but she doesn't know when on Monday she might have an episode.

Why can't her babysitter handle an asthma attack? Some one watches the kid, so that person can hand the kid an inhaler, right?

Shit don't make sense.

Merovigan 06-01-2012 01:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dakota Tebaldi (Post 434803)
Are you feeling ill suddenly?

I'm not Mero, in real life.

I'm Mero online, because I can't be Mero in real life.

Lucifer Baphomet 06-01-2012 01:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morgaine Alter (Post 434798)
That is asinine.
Forget the job but, why is she letting her child do things that make her sick? Why is she not managing the illness better and temperament the situation to a more level life style for the kids sake. Children do die from asthma and it is not fun having an attack. To risk it is not necessarily looking out for her child's interest and immature at best.

sounds completely fishy to me

Yes Children, and adults die because of Asthma...

Now, I'm assuming because she needs to be at home, the kid is pre school.

Now, Id say that you don't let the illness rule your kids (or your if you're the sufferer, your own) life.

You endeavour to live as normally as possible.

What I will admit has me flummoxed is why, after activity at the weekend, the asthma attack happens on the Monday, and not while the stressor is present.

When I was bad with my asthma, I didn't have delayed reactions, I had an attack when the environmental factors were there, not after they were gone... and from treating asthma in a nursing capacity, I only saw the same in others.

This delayed reaction thing makes no sense.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merovigan (Post 434804)
I would be fine with that setup but she doesn't know when on Monday she might have an episode.

Why can't her babysitter handle an asthma attack? Some one watches the kid, so that person can hand the kid an inhaler, right?

Shit don't make sense.

The delayed reaction is what has me perplexed...

Not the issue of needing to be there if the kid takes an attack.

Assuming her story is true, and we have all the facts... then we have to consider a the actual severity of the attacks.

A bad asthma attack isnt just "oh I feel short of breathe, pass me an inhaler please".

It feels like you're dying.

On top of that a nebuliser may be needed, but that's besides the point.

It's the psychological side that's the worst.

It feels like you are going to asphyxiate, and it's terrifying...

Even when you know you're gonna be OK, it still feels like you're gonna die.

I get the feeling there's more going on here, all in than meets the eye.

Maybe the kid is acting out in some way, and asthma isn't the real issue.

So yeah Mero..

Ghallenge her on the fact these attacks are occurring with no immediate stressor to trigger an exacerbation.

She might curse you for it, but you'll possibly be helping her get at another issue that's affecting the kid that needs addressed.

And if that gets resolved, she'll tell her kids and grandkids about the brilliant manager who helped her and her kid...

If however she's bullshitting, it'll come out in the wash.

Here's another alternative...

Would it be feasible for her to bring the kid into work.

Back in the 70s, when I was on school holidays, my mother used to take me to the office, where I'd sit and read, and I'd even perform tasks in the office ("here staple these reports together", "Here, punch holes in this ream of paper").

But yeah

There's something else going on here, from how you're describing it all...

Ayu Sura 06-01-2012 01:57 PM

Whenever I go downstate to Central Illinois to visit the in-laws, I come back with a raging headache for a few days from all the dust and pollen in the air from the farm land.

And sometimes wheezy.

I don't really get why she needs Mondays off for her kid - if what her kid's suffering is similar to what happens to me - then I'd either 1. pre-medicate as much as possible 2. have an inhaler on-hand 3. if it was that unmanageable then I would avoid activities that bring this on (ie expose myself as little as possible) instead of doing it EVERY WEEKEND.

I don't understand.

Morgaine Alter 06-01-2012 03:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morgaine Alter (Post 434798)
That is asinine.
Forget the job but, why is she letting her child do things that make her sick? Why is she not managing the illness better and temperament the situation to a more level life style for the kids sake. Children do die from asthma and it is not fun having an attack. To risk it is not necessarily looking out for her child's interest and immature at best.

sounds completely fishy to me

I don't get this either and a very good point that there would be an immediate reaction.
Also, I always go for a balance of living vs. being a prisoner to your illness. That is why I said some level or balance before that post and we dont know the age.
My son would have an attack asap when he was reacting, you do not react with asthma attacks this major a day or two later.

A babysitter can easily be shown how to use a nebulizer w/ meds such as pulmicort (if I remember the meds right) for sustaining and the albuteral drops for attacks.
They are easy to operate.

Cocoanut Koala 06-01-2012 04:19 PM

Maybe the kid doesn't want the mother to go back to work. Hence the Monday attacks.

Dakota Tebaldi 06-01-2012 04:21 PM

If Mero is anything, it's not a doctor. If she says there's a medical necessity that she'd like special hours to accommodate, Mero can decide or not based on things like workload, but he really has no standing to challenge her claims about her child's medical condition.

Frankly neither do we, since all we know about this situation is what Mero has told us.

Trout 06-01-2012 04:29 PM

She should be able to provide some sort of medical documentation - a letter from a doctor or something like that. It sounds pretty fishy to me, too. Maybe a doctor could explain why the attackes are happening on Mondays rather than at the time of the exposure to whatever triggers them.

I honestly can't remember exactly what the law says about people who are caretakers of disabled people. I know that if someone who has a disability themselves can accomplish the essential duties of the job with reasonable accommodation, then the employer is required to provide that accommodation and cannot fire them based on their disability. The laws of the state you're in may affect that as well, Mero. If the company has legal counsel, you might want to get an opinion letter in the file just to CYA.

Don't consider this legal advice - I'm not licensed in your state, nor do I have any clue what the laws in your state say. It's just something you might want to have someone take a look at before you decide to fire her. It's always best to cover your bases.

Cathiee McMillan 06-01-2012 04:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dakota Tebaldi (Post 434832)
If Mero is anything, it's not a doctor. If she says there's a medical necessity that she'd like special hours to accommodate, Mero can decide or not based on things like workload, but he really has no standing to challenge her claims about her child's medical condition.

Frankly neither do we, since all we know about this situation is what Mero has told us.

You are correct, and Mero can fire her or just deny her to work from home.
All he needs to say is you were hired to work from M-F from what ever time.
I think him deciding to try to help her out but she seems to not want to help him out. Sorry the employee also needs to bend sometimes.

So question for all the union people: How would the union help this mother out in this situation?

Lucifer Baphomet 06-01-2012 04:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cathiee McMillan (Post 434835)
So question for all the union people: How would the union help this mother out in this situation?

I don't know the specifics of employment law and the legislation US Unions operate under.

HOWEVER, one thing a union could certainly provide her with regardless, is free legal advice and representation

Dakota Tebaldi 06-01-2012 05:17 PM

Employment regs are more a state thing than a federal thing. Some states are "right to work" states, which if you're hired, you practically have to burn down the office before they can bin you without being exposed to a lawsuit for damages, lost wages, and even your job back; whereas other states are "right to fire" states, where an employer can fire you for any or no reason, sucks to be you (unless you can prove the firing was sex/race/religion motivated). At least that's my understanding of it. The unions in a state know exactly what they can or cannot do/get away with there.

This is oversimplified, btw...there are of course some federal regs, etc.

Trout 06-01-2012 05:22 PM

The laws I was thinking about are both state and federal. There are federal laws which prevent discrimination against people with disabilities, and then there are state laws which act as an overlay to the federal laws. You seriously don't want to violate one of those. The penalties can be brutal. I just don't know how or whether those laws apply to caretakers/parents/guardians of someone with a disability.

Bard Jameson 06-01-2012 05:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lucifer Baphomet (Post 434837)
I don't know the specifics of employment law and the legislation US Unions operate under.

HOWEVER, one thing a union could certainly provide her with regardless, is free legal advice and representation

Yes, and an important point - the union can help you determine if you have a case or not, based on the contract in place at the time. This is important, because if it ain't in the contract, then it ain't applicable (except, as others have said, where law comes into play).

Oryx Tempel 06-01-2012 08:33 PM

What's to say that she won't now take her kid out to play on Mondays in addition to Saturdays and Sundays, then suddenly start calling in on Tuesdays?

I call bullshit on her request.

Cocoanut Koala 06-01-2012 10:21 PM

Or the kid doesn't want her to go back to work (now on Tuesdays).

Morgaine Alter 06-01-2012 10:34 PM

You know what the shame is with this shady requests are the honest women who have these situations come up and have no choice in the matter because of ppl like her and prejudged.

Oryx Tempel 06-01-2012 10:50 PM

God, I can't believe that I'm actually agreeing with Morgaine 100%. :hug:

Merovigan 06-01-2012 10:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oryx Tempel (Post 434872)
What's to say that she won't now take her kid out to play on Mondays in addition to Saturdays and Sundays, then suddenly start calling in on Tuesdays?

I call bullshit on her request.

Who's to say that the kid isn't faking the problem to get more time with her parents? Not the asthma, obviously, but the wheezing they see on Mondays. Dunno.

Merovigan 06-01-2012 10:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morgaine Alter (Post 434910)
You know what the shame is with this shady requests are the honest women who have these situations come up and have no choice in the matter because of ppl like her and prejudged.

Ya know, the honest requests "feel" different. This feels wrong and dirty. The truth rarely has this sheen of "None of what you just said adds up or makes any sense to me." If this were on the up and up, I feel like we could have worked something out.

Merovigan 06-01-2012 10:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trout (Post 434846)
The laws I was thinking about are both state and federal. There are federal laws which prevent discrimination against people with disabilities, and then there are state laws which act as an overlay to the federal laws. You seriously don't want to violate one of those. The penalties can be brutal. I just don't know how or whether those laws apply to caretakers/parents/guardians of someone with a disability.

/asshole aside for a moment

But doesn't "disability" rise to a much higher level? My understanding of it is that it must be permanent and unfixable - asthma isn't a disability, is it? If that, then why not serious allergies like Peanut or Shellfish?

Kick Frenzy 06-01-2012 11:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merovigan (Post 434920)
/asshole aside for a moment

But doesn't "disability" rise to a much higher level? My understanding of it is that it must be permanent and unfixable - asthma isn't a disability, is it? If that, then why not serious allergies like Peanut or Shellfish?

You can avoid eating peanuts and shellfish.
Breathing, on the other hand, is a fairly common and important practice. ;)

Dakota Tebaldi 06-01-2012 11:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merovigan (Post 434918)
Who's to say that the kid isn't faking the problem to get more time with her parents? Not the asthma, obviously, but the wheezing they see on Mondays. Dunno.

Would you deny her request based on you suspecting her child might be faking it?

Morgaine Alter 06-01-2012 11:41 PM

http://www.aafa.org/display.cfm?id=9&sub=19&cont=255
Quote:

Does the ADA Apply to People with Asthma and Allergies?
Yes. In both the ADA and Section 504, a person with a disability is described as someone who has a physical or mental impairment that substantially limits one or more major life activities, or is regarded as having such impairments. Breathing, eating, working and going to school are "major life activities." Asthma and allergies are still considered disabilities under the ADA, even if symptoms are controlled by medication.

Cocoanut Koala 06-01-2012 11:45 PM

I think the woman may have a real need but just isn't good at communication and attitude.

In any case, the advice to check with a company lawyer before doing anything is good.

Merovigan 06-01-2012 11:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dakota Tebaldi (Post 434934)
Would you deny her request based on you suspecting her child might be faking it?

Nah.

JohnnyVann 06-02-2012 11:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merovigan (Post 434920)
/asshole aside for a moment

But doesn't "disability" rise to a much higher level? My understanding of it is that it must be permanent and unfixable - asthma isn't a disability, is it? If that, then why not serious allergies like Peanut or Shellfish?

Disability doesn't have to be permanent. You can be temporarily disabled

Oryx Tempel 06-02-2012 12:23 PM

I'm temporarily disabled this morning. I blame the whiskey from last night.

Merovigan 06-04-2012 10:26 AM

Wow.

Ok, so … today the client told me that this woman’s position is being cut. It has nothing to do with performance.

I was scheduled to speak with her direct boss (she’s a sub-contractor) today and I let her (boss) know that the end of the month was the end of the position. Her immediate reaction was:

“Is this for behavior?”
No. Not behavior. Not cause. If we had another position, I would put her onto it but we don’t.
“Ok… because you’d tell me if it were for cause, right?”
Um…ok, cards on the table – are you having trouble with her?
“Yes.”
Huh. Well, to be honest, she did approach me about working from home, and even threatened to quit over it, but her position going away has nothing to do with that. I feel I controlled that situation and maintained that working from home wasn’t an option, and then out of nowhere the client felt the need to close her position.

She didn’t give me any more info on exactly what trouble they were having with her, and I didn’t ask.

Interesting times.

Cathiee McMillan 06-04-2012 10:31 AM

Well,
Guess her direct boss will need to deal with the situation.
Just wash your hands of it and let them deal with it.
It appears that she has been having performance issues.

I am glade you calmed down and tried to work the other option, to have her work at home.

Trout 06-04-2012 10:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merovigan (Post 434920)
/asshole aside for a moment

But doesn't "disability" rise to a much higher level? My understanding of it is that it must be permanent and unfixable - asthma isn't a disability, is it? If that, then why not serious allergies like Peanut or Shellfish?

Morgaine already partially answered the question. It depends on the severity og the asthma and whether it affects the normal activities of life. Peanut and shellfish allergies are pretty easy to control because avoiding peanuts and shellfish if comparatively easy, and unless your job is working in a shellfish or peanut processing plant, you shouldn't have any problems doing your job.

The issue is whether someone needs a reasonable accommodation to perform the essential functions of the job.

In your case, I think a more important question is whether the law applies to caregivers of people with disabilities. If someone has a child with a disability, then does the law require reasonable accommodation to be given to them? If the answer is yes, then you can move on to whether this is a legitimate disability, whether the accommodation is reasonable, etc. If not, you can stop right there.

Merovigan 06-06-2012 07:40 PM

Tonight? Wine!!!

The chick was out today. Pretty sure she's job hunting. I told her the task ends at the end of the month. There was no drama, and she didn't seem surprised but she may just be hard to read.

Oh shit, I have a message on Skype. That never happens.

Oh shit, I think it's Beau's birthday! Say it to him, bitches.

Anyways, where was I ... oh right, drinking.

Be back later.

Merovigan 06-06-2012 07:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oryx Tempel (Post 434915)
God, I can't believe that I'm actually agreeing with Morgaine 100%. :hug:

That's another one of my powers - making people who have nothing in common agree with one another.

I'm a uniter, baby!

Unite ... er.

why isn't Uniter a word? One who unites.

Envoy Costagravas 06-07-2012 02:40 AM

Unitard.

Morgaine Alter 06-07-2012 10:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merovigan (Post 434919)
Ya know, the honest requests "feel" different. This feels wrong and dirty. The truth rarely has this sheen of "None of what you just said adds up or makes any sense to me." If this were on the up and up, I feel like we could have worked something out.

nah
It has happened to me with my son.

Morgaine Alter 06-07-2012 10:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merovigan (Post 435751)
That's another one of my powers - making people who have nothing in common agree with one another.

I'm a uniter, baby!

Unite ... er.

why isn't Uniter a word? One who unites.

We actually used to be friends when I was a newb hanging at the old club house in world.

GradyE 06-07-2012 11:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Envoy Costagravas (Post 435788)
Unitard.

Look away Envoy.

http://www.buzzhunt.co.uk/wp-content...at-mankini.jpg

:p

Merovigan 06-07-2012 01:43 PM

Nine years, today.

Expect emotionalism.

Cocoanut Koala 06-07-2012 11:44 PM

Nine years what?

Merovigan 06-08-2012 01:37 PM

Nine years of marriage.


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